Here is a scenario; you dine with your beautiful spouse at a 5 star French restaurant to celebrate an important event.  The dinner was what you needed to make your other half feel loved. After you paid your bill, you stand up to leave.  “HOLD ON SIR!!!” someone yelled at you before you were about to past the exit door, “YOU HAVEN’T CLEARED YOUR TABLE!”

Imagine being asked to make your own room at Ritz Carlton, Hyatt, or at the Raffles Hotel.  Imagine being asked to bring your cup to the collection centre at a high class lounge.  How about pouring your own drinks at a private banking lounge?

For some reason, the above will make you feel… “ODD”.  Why would it sound so right when we asked people to clear their tables at food courts and hawker centres (for our overseas readers, it is like a food centre) but atrocious when you are asked to do the same at expensive restaurants.

This article explores the reasons behind the discrimination in this application of “graciousness” and the need for the “clearing your own table” movement in Singapore.

Prime Minister’s National Day Speech in August 2008

The call for graciousness came from Singapore’s Prime Minister, Mr Lee Hsien Loong, at the National Day Rally speech in August 2008.  His reason was simple; Singapore is going to hold more international events and it is important to make sure foreigners visiting the nation feel the warmth of our nation.  The call seems to be similar to that done in China before the 2008 Olympics.

The Prime Minister (PM) quoted a member of the public that said that if people can clear their table at home, why not outside the home.  With this quote, the call was clear - clear your table like you would at your own home.  With this call from the PM, The Straits Times – together with the foodcourt operator - launched the “Goodness Gracious Me” campaign to remind the public to clear their table after their meal.

Graciousness, the Campaign, the Its Strategy

What does clearing your own table after your meal have to do with graciousness?  To answer the question, it will be good to look at some definitions.  Longman dictionary defines “gracious” as:

1. Behaving in a polite, kind, and generous way, especially to people of a lower class.

2. Having the kind of expensive style, comfort, and beauty that only rich people can afford.

3. A word meaning kind and forgiving, used to describe God.

Of the three definitions provided by Longman dictionary, it would seem that the first definition would be the most appropriate for our discussion.  To be gracious, one has exhibit three qualities from this definition, kindness, politeness, and generosity.  Again, looking at the definitions provided by Longman dictionary, the definitions of these words are:

1. kind - saying or doing things that show you care about other people and want to help them or make them happy

2. polite – behaving or speaking in a way that is correct for the social situation you are in and showing that you are careful to consider other people’s needs and feelings.

3. Generous – i)willing to give money, spend time, etc, in order to help people or give them pleasure.  ii) sympathetic in a way you deal with people, and tending not to criticize them, get angry, or treat them unkindly.

Being gracious is a tall order from the definition above.  So what would inherently motivate anyone to undertake such behaviour inherently? The answer is simple - the expectation of reciprocity.  The act of being gracious is rewarding because the doer expects someone else to be gracious back to him or her too.  I clear the table for others after my meals because I also expect others to do it for me.  If they don’t, I will be annoyed.

(Of course, I have not forgotten those that act graciously because it is right. But I am very sure that for those who feel this way will not be annoyed that others are not doing the same for you.  If you do feel annoyed, just admit what you are. Let’s move on.)

Again, what does clearing the table have to do with being gracious?  It is difficult to change people’s behaviour, but maybe if we could encourage them to embrace some graciousness in something simple first, we can then expound on it later.  The act of clearing your table after your meal is gracious because the next person could then start to dine without the need to clear your mess.  It is easy for you to clean your own “dirt” but it can be mentally disturbing for others.  That is the main value behind it – it reduces the chance that someone may not enjoy their meal because they have to touch your mess.

To encourage people to clean their own mess, the campaign utilises the strategy of shaming.  The strategy is simple, create an awareness that the public campaign exist and that members of the public – even the cleaning workers - are given the “power” to order you to clean up your mess in such a campaign.  If you do not act in accordance, the members of the public can shame you by criticising your behaviour openly.  The application of this disutility (from shame) should be sufficient for someone to clean up their mess even though the non-action itself is not punishable by law.  Hopefully after some time, people will internalise such behaviour and do it automatically.

Should We Clear Our Table at Restaurants Too?

Why does it seem right to ask foodcourt patrons to clear their table after a meal but feels odd to ask restaurant customers to do the same?  The answer is obvious, because we pay a lot more money in the restaurants; the clearing and subsequently setting up of the table is an expected service.

But wait a minute, the definition of graciousness as stated above does not seem to have such a condition.  It is defined as “behaving in a polite, kind, and generous way” and not “behaving in a polite, kind, and generous way, provided you are not paying for it.”  To give the excuse that you are not clearing your table because you are paying for it will be against the “generous” part of graciousness.  So, a truly gracious person will clear his or her table regardless of where he or she is – in the foodcourt or hawker centre – and he or she will not be annoyed or complain about others when they don’t.

Furthermore, foodcourt operators charge higher prices compared to hawker centres for their food not because they offer better food but because they offer a better experience.  Foodcourts charge more then hawker centres because they are air-conditioned and they also present a cleaner façade then the hawker centre counterparts.  To achieve cleanliness, individual stall operators pay the foodcourt operator a fee to collect and wash the dishes and also clear and clean the tables. 

Why Do Foodcourt Operators Need Us to Be Gracious?

So like restaurants, the cost of clearing the tables has already been charged to the patrons and if restaurants do not expect us to clear their tables, why then are we asked to clear the table at foodcourts?

Here is a possible answer.  Since hawker centres provide the cheapest cooked food alternative, we would expect them to provide their products with no frills.  But a matter of fact is that they do – and it comes in the form of allowing patrons to leave without clearing their mess after meals.  If that is the case, foodcourt operators cannot differentiate themselves on this ground and cost incurred by them to clear tables will just be dead weight cost.  To minimise such cost, operators will have to ensure that “table clearing” staffs do not just clear tables.  They will also ensure that they do not employ too many of such staff and demand that such staff be extremely productive.  But we all know what happens when staffs are overworked.

Another way to reduce cost then is to transfer the cost back to the patrons – that is to make them clear their tables and bring the utensils to a common collection point.  But competition would mean that enforcement of such a policy on profit oriented basis would lead patrons to other competing foodcourt operators who do not enforce such rules or back to hawker centres or even restaurants.

Supporting the campaign is therefore a great excuse.  The campaign allows supporting operators to emphasize on the “ideal behaviour” of the patrons rather then on a profit objective of the operator.  Their move is even defended by righteous critics – saving them even the need to employ or activate a team of expensive corporate communications professionals.  And if all else fails, they could also appeal to the public’s empathy by focusing on how hard the cleaning staffs – who are mostly made up of the old and the poor - have to work because we are not gracious.

How Can We Encourage People to Clean Their Mess Then?

Frankly, if foodcourt wish to transfer the cost back to patrons, all they needed to do was to look towards what the groceries companies have done.  For years, groceries companies such as Cold Storage and NTUC Fairprice had to undertake the cost of locating and collecting their trolleys at carparks after patrons have used the trolleys.  To reduce such deadweight cost, these groceries companies created dedicated collection centres in the carparks.  To encourage patrons to return trolleys to these collection points, a locking mechanism was installed in all their trolleys.  Patrons must insert a one dollar coin into the device to unlock the trolley and can only retrieve the dollar after they have relocked the trolley at the collection point.  If patrons do no wish to return their trolley, then they can leave the dollar coin in the locking mechanism who would then be a nice reward for the staff – or anyone else – who returns the trolley to the collection point.

Likewise, if foodcourt operators are willing to provide some form of money back to patrons for returning their utensils – since foodcourt prices have already charged for such a service – then there is no need to hide behind the call for graciousness to help them improve profitability.

If foodcourt operators’ objective is really to help the older folks who are working for them as cleaners, they could simply give out some of the money that were not refunded to customers (who did not return their utensils) as daily bonus payments to the cleaners for their hard work rather then keep the money in the firm as profits. 

True Graciousness Do Start From Home!

The quote on clearing your table after meals given by the PM was hard for me to accept as a form of gracious act.  The definition of gracious as I understood so far is about consideration for others and not just for oneself.  We clear our table after meals at home because if we don’t we would have to undertake the direct cost of the mess.  So to tell others to do it outside the home just because you do it at home was not appealing because you suffer if you don’t anyway.  But if the examples are these, I can understand:

1. I do not smoke at home because the smell goes to someone else’s house.  I try to smoke at places where others will not be affected by my smoke – even if it meant walking some distance.  If I can do it for my neighbours, why not for the rest!

2. I do not bring my kids to the corridor when he or she cries because I will disturb my neighbour.  While I hope they understand that I can’t control when the kids cry, I also have to understand that they do not need to share the burden.  So if I can do that for my neighbour, why not for the rest?

3. I make sure that I adhere to the rules and regulation of the estate I stay in because that is how we can live harmoniously in such communal condition.  Things I do not strictly do are leaving things outside the house or put items in the emergency exit just to take advantage of the common areas as additional storage to my house.  I believe if I can respect the rights of my neighbours, I can do that for others too!

4. I would be polite to my neighbours but I will not take advantage of the situation.  I am nice to them because I am truly nice and not that they should be “understanding” when I do not adhere to the rules and regulation of the estate for my benefit.  I believe if I can be truly nice without expecting any reciprocity, then the action of others will not affect me.

So there is really no need to show off that we are gracious outside the house. Just start by respecting the laws of the state, the rules and regulation of the estate you stay in, and the rights of your neighbours.